Day 365: Last Day

Where can I even begin this post?

How about at the point I forgive myself for not being able to live up the the unrealistic expectations I sometimes place on myself.

No one noticed that I didn't actually post every single day in 2014, like I had mentioned I would do here, did they?

Don't worry, I've long ago forgiven myself, so you should do the same.
Not that I want to tell you what to do.

But it's my blog, so I guess I can at least ask you to just ignore my inadequacies.

Let's move on...

Tonight I will watch the ball drop.  Or maybe I won't.  I haven't decided yet.  The great thing about getting older is that the pressure of doing amazing things on special days has lost its charm.  Instead I want to do amazing things on ordinary days and leave the special days to the young people while I respectfully observe my 10:00 bedtime. 

Today, like anyone with a pulse living the Gregorian calendar, I was reflecting on my 2014. 

This year has been a big year - but I could pretty much say that about every year I've had since I turned 10.  Probably every year before as well.  That's the funny thing about years in our lives - they continuously change.  They continuously mold us into different people.  (I still don't really remember 2010, but I'm sure that's because it changed me so much.)

These years shape us.  In my case, this year has shaped me into a squishy blob of culinary contentment. (A nice way of saying "extra weight gain".)  But it has also shaped me into some semblance of the mother I want to be - the sister and daughter I want to be.  I like myself a lot more than I used to, and one can never complain about that.

So today I'm thankful for another year. 

Another year to be a mother to my three favorite boys on the planet.
Another year to work on being a sister that is understanding and forgiving.
Another year to strive to be a gracious and helpful daughter.
Another year to become a better teacher.
Another year to love my friends.
Another year to sleep, eat, and work alongside the only adult person I want to be around every single day.

And another few days to binge-watch Netflix.  I'm also thankful for that.

p.s. I can't wait to tell you all about my Christmas.  It was EPIC...(if "epic" to you means potty training and gaining 20 pounds in Christmas cookies and Buckeyes.)

Day 348: Oy.

Birthday boy with birthday spoils

Someday you may show up at the movie theater without your kid on his birthday.

I'm not saying that you for sure will do this.  I'm just throwing out there that you may do it.

You may have a perfect birthday plan for him that you've been going over and over with him for three days in a row.  You may go over this plan with your husband, and you may blissfully go about your day thinking that everything is going to fall into place perfectly.

You may even be so on top of your game that you find a babysitter for your other two kids so that your middle son can have you and your husband all to himself.  You may drop him off at the church in the afternoon for a play date, promising that his dad will pick him up and that you'll see him at the movie theater - in anticipation of the movie he's been begging to see for weeks.

Once he's safely tucked away at the church with a handful of activities and his most favorite people, you may decide to do some Christmas shopping that you've been putting off.  You may or may not receive cryptic text messages from your husband about the evening plans, and you may or may not be annoyed that he seemingly wasn't listening when you made the plans.

At around 4:00 you may arrive at the movie theater and buy three tickets for Big Hero 6, along with a giant popcorn for all of you to share.  You may eat 1/3 of it while you're waiting for the other two to arrive.

Finally you may see your husband walk up, and when he opens the door to the theater, you ask him where Liam is.  He may look at you with a confused stare, followed by glances around his feet like your son is just hiding underfoot like a cat.

You may panic.
You may start crying.
You may realize that one of you was supposed to pick him up half an hour ago and that it will take at least that to get back to the church.

You may get in the car and with shaky hands, try to find a phone number that will connect you to the adults on the other end.  You may say things like, "I can't believe we forgot our son ON HIS BIRTHDAY!"

Eventually you would probably get there, only to realize that no one is panicked and people have words of grace and stories of their own.  You would probably apologize endlessly.

You may realize once you're back in the car, and headed to another theater that everything is going to be okay.  You would probably decide that another $25 is okay to spend on a movie you already have tickets to, all things considered, but you would definitely chow down on the popcorn in the car to save buying another one.

Your son will probably spend all evening saying things like, "Thank you for letting me stay longer with Mrs. Kim and Mr. Mark.  I got to stay there the LONGEST!"  You may feel like you got away with this one.

Then three days later your son, out of nowhere, may ask you, "Why did you and Dad forget to pick me up on my birthday?"

Today I am thankful for gracious adults that take such good care of my children, especially when I'm not always on top of my game.

Day 342: Liam

Dear 5 Year Old, Full of Sass, Liam,

Today you turn 5, and it is a day that has been anticipated and planned and dreamed about for many weeks.  Perhaps it is the first birthday you'll remember as an adult, and look back on with fond memories. 
But probably not, because you never forget anything.

My life is so much fuller with you in it.  Full of cuddling (your favorite thing to do), music, dancing, laughter, and even arguments.

You are a firecracker in this big dull world, and I hope your light never goes out.  I hope you never stop questioning things (although you could stop questioning EVERYTHING. I. DO. for awhile and that would be nice).  I hope you never stop trying to make people laugh.  I hope you never stop dancing and singing without abandon.  I hope you are always proud to be yourself.

This early morning there is a new teepee and tap shoes waiting for you under the Christmas lights you so eagerly hung.  I can't wait for you to open them.  Because you live life in a constant state of excitement, I love living it with you.

Today I am thankful you are in my life.

I'll love you forever little luchóg.
xoxo
Your mom.

Day 338: Guest

Today I was lucky enough to serve as a guest blogger over at one of my new favorite shops.  Bushbaby is a fantastic store that sells new and used childre's clothing, along with many fairtrade goods. 

First, check out their blog (and my guest post) here.  Second, travel around their website a bit to see everything they have to offer.

I am thankful for this shop and everything it stands for.  You must check it out sometime!