These last few days have been filled with constant stomach aches and absolutely no sleep. I'm not sure if it is excitement or nerves because my life is about to change dramatically. It's crazy how you wait and wait and wait until you think you can't wait anymore, and then all of the sudden you feel like it is sprung on you.....not the doubts about getting a baby....I will NEVER doubt that Miles is supposed to be ours and the fact that I have loved him for months without ever meeting him, but I'm suddenly anxious about parenting. Until now I've lived my life for me... doing all of the the selfish things that I COULD do because I didn't have kids. Nothing has ever held me back from doing exactly what I want and when I want to do it. It is not that I will miss those things....it is that I am afraid I won't know how to give them up. People say it just comes naturally, and I would assume that it would come ultra naturally to me since I have wanted to be a parent for so long, but it is still so weird to consider.
Today we are checking out some local daycares for this fall (Septemberish) since I've decided that I am definitely going back to work then. It is weird to check them out before we even have a baby, but at the same time it is so excited to plan for Miles. :)
6 comments:
I am sure you will be fine.
My stomach has been in knots too. And this is my 4th child. Knots are normal!!! Hang in there. Have fun checking out daycares.
Tiffany, I threw up 5 days before we left from nerves. Literally, threw up. I think you are right, for so long the baby is just this sort of abstract dream, but packing Seth's clothes and toys into a suitcase and knowing in less than a week I would meet him pushed me over the edge. We are so used to waiting in adoption, it feels very unsettling in a way to "not be waiting" anymore. I was told once by someone that nerves and excitement are often the same heightened physical emotion, so you are probably getting this overwhelming feeling from both sides.
As for giving things up--I think everyone is different, but we are all human. For me, as much as I was prepared and as much as I wanted it, transitioning into motherhood was not as easy as I had hoped for me. We are only human and babies take away a lot of our independence. They are worth it, absolutely, but it is a sacrifice. Be kind to yourself in the coming weeks and months and let yourself feel everything you might be feeling. Everyone will be better for it.
Have a great last couple "normal" nights!
Ditto...on just about everything you said! :-)
My hubby & I are first time parents after many years of being childless and independant. We always liked being able to pick up and go at a moment's notice...lol..that will be a thing of the past (until our Isaac gets a bit bigger, I'm sure)
Once Sunday comes, our lives will forever change. It's an exciting, scary, happy, scary thing! :)
See ya Sunday!
Tiff and Dustin - just want you to know you are in my prayers. And I KNOW you will both be incredible parents. It will definitely be a transition, and not always easy or even natural, but it will come...and you'll all be stronger and better together because of it. I'm so excited for you! Good luck with all the travel and arrangements.
Tiffany the biggest change - and possibly the most unsettling - is seeing the things you want to do change so much. You actually want to stay in and hang out with your little monkeys. Even I was that way for a LONG time. You will have lots of eager helping hands when you need some Tiff Time:)
Have a wonderful and safe trip!!!!! - Cori
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