Random thoughts....

One of my favorite, and most quirky things about Liam right now is his love affair with tiny plastic toys. Right now, as I type this, my son sleeps soundly in his crib clutching a rubber nemo bath toy that he insisted on taking to bed with him.  Last night it was a plastic car.  A few weeks ago it was a spoon.  He doesn't just sleep with it, he clutches it close to his heart all day long - never letting it out of his sight. 
The most popular victim is this tiny little Ernie doll playing baseball. 

 He continuously asks for "Er-ie" throughout the day.  Yesterday he took his nap with the orange guy and everytime I checked on him he was in a different position, but always holding Ernie.

I thought this was all incredibly crazy....until I found out that my husband once slept with a Christmas Ornament as a young boy.  sheesh, the poor kid is doomed.

And just because I haven't posted any pictures in awhile.....

Oh!  And one more thing.  I wanted to show off this super sweet toy box my grandpa made for Miles and Liam.  I asked him to build it at Christmas, and when he showed it to me at Easter I was stunned by how gorgeous it is.  I think it may be one of the most beautiful things I own, and I will cherish for a very long time.

Now, I need to get to bed....because when I wake up tomorrow morning I will be a mother of a three year old.  Can you believe it?  I'm still trying to wrap my head around it.

Being liked.

When I was younger I cared a lot more about being liked by others than I do now.  If I was honest, I would admit that I want to be liked (who doesn't?), but I'm not going to alter who I am so that I'm accepted or cool.  Like most people in their thirties I've found the friends that love me for who I am, I've ironed out my priorities, and I've allowed myself to dismiss the people who create negative energy in my wake. I guess I've grown up.
But I have one weakness that I keep finding myself faced with.  I want people to like my kids.  No, scratch that.....I want people to LOVE my kids.  I don't need them to constantly tell me how cute they are, or that they are the most amazing children in the world (because they are....duh.).  I just want them to be genuinely liked.
This is hard for me.  Because I think they're pretty amazing.  And, like I'm sure most other parents realize about their own children, my kids do all of these amazing, wonderful, loving, things when they're alone with me.
Then we go out into public.
And they hit each other.  And they fight.
And they have accidents in the church nursery on the day I forgot to pack an extra pair of pants.  (And we're talking a MAJOR accident.)
I don't expect my kids to get doted on....but don't you want everyone to know how amazing your child is?  Don't you want them to see your child for the caring, cuddly, smart, little darling they are?  As much as I hate to admit it.... I do.
But I have a feeling that I'm going to need to get over it.
Because there are going to be teachers that don't think my son is as smart as I do.
There will be teenagers that don't think my son is as cool as I think he is.
And there will probably be other parents that talk about what a trouble maker my son is.
Luckily for all of us, I have enough love exploding out of me to make up for all of that.....I just hope that it's enough for them.

What not to wear....parents should know better edition.

With all this digging around old scrapbooks for pictures lately I have been continuously reminded of the dire mistakes my parents must have made in dressing me as a child....especially when Dustin is looking over my shoulder shouting..."hey!  Look at that one!" every time I turn the page of a scrapbook.
So, as an instructional guide, I have compiled a photo essay of

What Not to Dress Your Child Who is Too Young to Know Better In......

What is this?  I wonder why they stopped making them.  It is so flattering.Even the weird animal with horns is wondering what the heck I'm wearing. 

I bet this seemed cute at the time....I wish you could see all of the pictures from this page. 

It's a wonder I wasn't mistaken for a boy 90% of the time by strangers.

One word: Seriously??!!  If there was ever any doubt who the favorite child was, let it be clarified simply by this photo and the comparative elevation of our shorts.

Who needs dress-up clothes?  When you can simply wear your mom's slip and some crazy matching stocking hat from the closet.

I love this photo because it shows my early artist-self in action...unfortunately the suspenders were not only worn for painting.

I like to picture my mom picking this up in a department store and saying to herself...."This would be so cute on Tiffany."

And simply to counteract the above photo....  I've never been able to wear blue eye shadow since.

And one last gem....the one I can't technically blame on my parents....

 

Because I'm 80% sure I wore those watermelon shorts to every game and definitely knotted my shirt on my own - my own sporty flare if you will.  Who said you can't play sports and look good at the same time?

Maybe I'm being too hard on my parents.  I was growing up in the 80's, and I'd venture to bet that most of you had similar clothing....I hope not, but I wouldn't doubt it. 

And the truth of the matter is....things do seem way cuter to you when you're the adult dressing the little person, and I'm sure my sons can someday look back on our pictures and make fun of their mama.

Lessons from my mom...

On this, my third Mother's Day as a mom and as a blogger, I've decided to record the top ten most valuable things my mother has passed on to me.

My mom and me at the lake....perhaps my favorite picture of her.

1.  Don't leave the house without mascara on....The older I get, the more I follow this rule.  In fact, one day I didn't wear any to run to the grocery store and saw someone I know, only to have them proceed to tell me how tired and awful I looked.  But it isn't just about looking good....its more about confidence.  Do you feel confident going to the mall in your sweats and no makeup?  If so, you're a better person than I. 
2.  Always wear your nicest outfit on the airplane.  I never understood this before.  Others would be wearing basketball shorts and flipflops on the plane and we'd be dressed in our nicest vacationing outfit.  I guess it sort of makes sense.  I mean, what if you are upgraded and are seated next to Mark Wahlberg.  Nobody wants Marky Mark to see them in shapeless soccer shorts (and no mascara). Or what if you're getting off the plane behind Nicole Kidman and end up as the background in some Tabloid magazine?  These are the most reasonable things I can come up with to this day....yet I still follow the rule.
3.  Suck it up and go to school.  It doesn't matter if you were embarrassed to the highest degree yesterday or if your heart got broken two hours ago.  You're friends all turned on you yesterday with some backstabbing note they passed around?  You will go to school and you will look like you're having the time of your life.  Looking back, and as a mother now, I wonder how my mom had the strength to ship me off to school when I clearly was in agony.  It would have been so much less heartbreaking and easier to let me stay home.  But, then would I ever really bounce back?  Would I be as strong as I am today?  I have a dear friend from those days that just told me recently that she wishes her mother would have done the same for her. 
4.  It's just "stuff."  When my parents moved to Brazil I went home for one last weekend.  I pulled into the driveway to see my mom selling what seemed like everything they owned in a garage sale.  I was in shock.  I went through everything saying "Are you sure you want to get rid of this?" over and over again.  I couldn't believe she was selling vases from her wedding and plates I had eaten off of growing up.  That, on top of the fact that she was walking away from the house my dad and her built right before I was born.  It was more than my 20-something heart could take.  She just kept telling me "It's just stuff."
5.  Dress for the job your want.  It took me 1.5 years to get a teaching job after college.  I worked at a daycare in the meantime.  I was fed up with my situation and afraid of never getting the job I wanted.  One day my mom saw what I wore to work.  It wasn't nice, or professional...it basically looked like how I felt about my job.  That was the end of that. 
6.  Smile with your eyes.  The secret to perfect pictures....a rule I'm still trying to figure out.  I found myself saying it to a student just the other day.  She looked at me the same way I'm guessing I looked at my mom when I was that age and she was shouting that at me from behind the camera. 
7.   Eat the chili.  One time when we were little we went to my aunt and uncle's house for Sunday lunch.  My aunt had made chili in the crock pot and had somehow burnt it.  I remember we could smell it as soon as we walked in.  As we were waiting to eat my mom swept us three older kids into one of the back bedrooms and told us up front.  1.  The chili is burnt.  2.  You are going to take a little bit.  3.  You are going to eat it.  4.  You will not complain.  There are a lot of things in life that could be classified as "burnt chili" and I think that this tiny little moment was such an important one in my development as a little person.
8.  Invite everyone.  I had a Halloween party in 8th grade.  It was my first boy/girl party.  My mom told me if I did it that I had to invite everyone.  I thought that was incredibly awesome.....except that she really meant EVERYONE.  Not a single eighth grader and seventh grader (my brother was only a year behind me) from our middle school was invitationless.  I even invited what classified as the "mean girls" and "losers" and "derelicts".  And you know what? It ended up being awesome.
9.  You are never too good for anyone else.  I was not allowed to think this even for a minute.  And I think it is one of the most valuable things my mother taught me. 
10.  Find the thing you love to do more than anything in the world.....and turn it into a career.  When I told my mom I wanted to be an Art Major she never asked what I can do for a living.  When I switched to Photojournalism she never reminded me that I would be working nights and weekends my whole life.  When I switched to art education I could hear an audible sigh of relief on the other end.....like she knew that was what I was made for....she just wanted me to be sure. 

So for my mother....Happy Mother's Day.  I am reminded today of my friends who have lost their mothers too soon.  I just want to remind you that I have a lot more to learn from you...so please stick around.  You are my lifeline.
I love you.
Tiff

A Celebration of Sorts...

Happy Children's Day!  This year we invited a few of our favorite big and little people to celebrate children - a traditional May 5th holiday in South Korea  (and Cinco De Mayo for the adults).  So over BeeBimBop and Margaritas we celebrated our children and each other.

Egg rolls - Korean style...for those BOF fans - Jun Pyo's fave. :)

BeeBimBop and Chapchae - my fave.

And of course Beef Enchiladas for those looking for a little Mexican flair.

Ellie opting for some green beans from home.

Liam so happy to finally eat!

Kiddy chopsticks

Caleb sneaking some food from Uncle Ben

Aedan fishing for some prizes.

Our youngest participant...Josie Jane.

The spoils...

All the kids together with a cake.  It isn't turned the right way, but it says Happy Children's Day in Hangul....at least I hope that's what it says. :)  Poor Ellie was not excited about the picture. :(

The party got a little wild when the pants came off.

The lonely party animal left by himself after the guests all went home.

Tighty Whities

This was going to be a Wordless Wednesday photo, but I just couldn't go without writing about it as well.  

This photo reminded me this morning of how much my little boy is growing.  

How the baby I brought home from Korea is getting so big so fast. 

How much he makes me laugh.

How he always keeps me on my toes.

How he is constantly observing, soaking everything in.

How I can't imagine a life without him.

Hurry up and wait...

A few weeks ago I decided to do something and even got my sometimes-hard-to-convince-husband on board right away.
Before I did this I prayed.  I prayed that I would release my fate to God's will.  I prayed that I would make decisions based on what God wanted for my life.  And I prayed that I would be okay with it.
And I was.
When we were only three days in.
It was so easy to say....God's will be done when the idea and decision were fresh.  If it worked out, great.... if it didn't, fine..... it was God's will.
So we put ourselves out there.  We took steps that were out of our comfort zone.  We did it quickly because we were told we needed to hurry.
And now we're waiting.
And I'm singing a different tune.
I still recite to myself that I am subject to God's will. But I'm failing.  Because now I check my email incessantly....like every 2 minutes. 
And it takes me back....boy, does it take me back.  To all of the paperwork.  All of the waiting.  All of the praying.
These last few days, (and I'm not kidding, we're only talking about a few days here people) I have been reminded of how bad I am at waiting.  How much I struggle to submit to a timeline put in place by someone much greater than myself.
But I'm also reminded that the best things in my life have come to me through waiting... the most beautiful things in my life were never just handed to me as soon as I wanted them.
I had to wait for my husband to figure out that I was the perfect girl to fall in love with.
I had to wait for my oldest son to come home.
I had to wait to get pregnant.
I had to wait until a teaching job was ready for me.
And now I have to wait again.

I can't doubt for a minute that this waiting is going to end in something beautiful. 

You would think I would get it, that I would be a seasoned pro by now. 
Perhaps what I really need to be praying for right now is patience.  Because I'm going to need it.

{Don't get excited people. If I told you what it was you would be disappointed at the insignificance of it.  And for those that already have the gears cranking in your head, it has nothing to do with babies. :) }